Angel of mine
by InnocentlyCorrupt
Summary: This was originally posted on quizilla but then decided to put it up here as well. x3 Sakurai Kira OC thinks about his unrequited love and how, despite it all , he gave everything up for her.


To be a part of squad 11, you must have guts. A will to fight and the will to die. An enjoyment of battle, you must have. To fight every battle like your last.

My name is Sakurai, Kira. I'm approximately 5'11'' and have a defined built. With shaggy jet black hair and amethyst eyes; I've been told that I am rather handsome. Even beautiful.

You have no idea how badly that makes me want to tear out someone's jugular and laugh maniacly over their corpse as they spew blood like a fountain.

You. Have. No. Idea.

With my being in squad 11, it wouldn't so strange either. Even if it was, I wouldn't care.

And despite my callous personality and my eloquent speech. (If you could call it that.) I am an angry person, brash, reckless and crude.

I actually never show this side of myself to my squad, to my friends...

To anyone.

No one but that angel, that dear sweet angel, has ever seen this side of me. She's the only one I've ever spoken my inner thoughts to. The only one I've admitted my fears to, the only one whom I've ever felt in the bottom of my heart: I have to protect her. At all costs, from all threats. From **anyone** who would try to harm her.

She's my everything.

Orihime is her name. Ah, how her name suits her well. She truly is a princess. And as her knight, I will forever protect her.

Even if she'll never acknowledge me.

Even if all she'll ever do is look at him. Only him. Kurosaki Ichigo.

How I would love to stomp on his carrot top until he becomes a **true** redhead.

But I can't, that sweet girl would cry and I would have to be a true fiend to make an angel weep.

"Sakurai-san!" Ah, the angel calls. Turning my body towards the girl, I realize I am unable too. It pains me too much. "Sakurai-san!!" She screams with more urgency. Her voice strains as tries to come to me but is being held back. Oh, how my heart aches to know that I'm causing such a girl pain.

Death, I deserve death.

But before that, the least I could do for myself is reminisce. In the good times; how I met this girl and how my heart was taken before I had even acknowledged it.

It was when she was but a ryoka to me...

"Yo! Kira! Let's go, man. We'll get in trouble if we don't head out to fight the ryoka!" My best friend, Ryoichi called.

I rolled my eyes as I stretched my body out. "Why the hell would I want to? Frig, there are like...how many ryoka and we **all** have to head out? That's bullshit." I threw a dismisive hand towards him as I continued to lounge around.

"I know, but we have to get going! It's Yamamoto-san's orders. What are we going to do about that?"

I craned my neck, ignoring his question. "Want to go drink some sake? It'll be great!" Hearing him repeat his statement caused a frown to form on my face. "That guy? Damn, when is he going to kick the bucket? He's been around since the dawn of time!"

Ryoichi tried to scold me but had problem supressing his laughter. "Just..haha...get..your ass out there!" He managed to shout before laughing and running out the door.

"Tch, fine." Heaving myself up, I trotted outside. Lazily looking for some ryoka.

That was when I came across Captain Zaraki with lieutenant Yachiru and a female on his shoulder. Behind him was Ikkaku, Yumichika and Aramaki.

My eyes travelled back to the strange girl on captain's shoulders. What kind of person could she be to be on **his** shoulder?

That was when she first caught my interest.

She caught it once more when I saw how hard she tried to save Kuchiki Rukia alongside her friends.

Again when I realized how kind she was and how she tries hard to protect and heal those around her. Friend or foe didn't matter to her. She still did it.

The first time I had spoken to her, she said the strangest thing:

"Wow! Your eyes! They're like...egg plants!" I blanched as I stepped back from her.

_Egg plants? That's a new one..._

She frowned as she tried to grasp something. "No, no...not egg plants...grapes??"

I narrowed my eyes. _Grapes now??_

Once more she tried to grasp something. "Oh, I don't know! But they're really nice." She smiled up at me, expecting me to thank her for the compliment.

Instead my lip twitched. "You're an odd child. Have you fallen on your head for the last 15 years??"

Instead of crying like I expected too, she blinked as she pondered. "Not to my knowledge." She laughed. "Although, if I did, I guess it'd make sense that I don't remember!"

My heart warmed at the strange memory. She was such a simple girl. Such a sweet girl. I don't deserve someone like that.

Time had past as we continued to chat. I found myself looking forward to speaking to her and marvelled at the fact that I pour my thoughts out to her. I hadn't even done that with Ryoichi, fearing he'd make fun of me. But her, she simply smiled or talked alongside me with such euthiasm. It made me feel good, important. Like I really mattered.

So when I heard she had been captured (and by arrancars no less.) I had come running. I ran despite the protest. I didn't care for the orders and I didn't care for the consequences. I didn't care I could be considered a traitor and executed as such.

I didn't care, I didn't care and the reason was because of her. With my light gone, what will keep me from the dark?

I had forced Ichigo to accept my help and was surprised when he didn't argue. He accepted me and even thanked me.

It was at that moment that I realized why I hated him so. He was a better man than me and I knew I could never beat him for her affections.

It hurt, it hurt but I carried on nonetheless.

When we made it to Hueco Mundo, I fought despite everything. Despite my injuries and despite having nearly died a multitude of times. I had something fueling me and the fire within me refused to diminish no matter what. I am of squad 11 after all, I still have that fighting spirit.

But eventually my body gave up, my spirit weakened. It could have been because the adrenaline I was running on ceased upon seeing her face. Upon seeing her alright and without a scratch. A euphoria began to wash over me.

I was happy, so happy. I almost wanted to cry. But what's this? She's crying, why? I gazed down at myself and realized immediately.

Ah, yes. I'm going to die.

I had pushed on no matter who the enemy was, no matter what my damage was and despite my body's protest. It resulted in my broken and bloody self laying on the ground now. Blood spluttered out of my mouth as I coughed. My breathing was ragged and weak. I knew it was going to be my end soon. Ichigo who was too absorbed in his fight with an espada hadn't been able to help me. A chuckle escaped my lips as I imagined the pain he would feel at my loss.

He was much too soft, that boy. He would never make it in squad 11.

I stared weakly as Orihime was being held back by a small arrancar child. The child cried but stayed firm nonetheless. What a strong child, Orihime should learn a thing from her.

Orihime came running to me despite the child's protests. She rushed over to me and fell to her knees. "Sakurai-san..." She managed to say despite her blubbering. She tried to place her shaky hands over my form. "I don't...know where t-to start." She brought a hand over to her face and began trying to wipe at her tears.

My body was so broken and torn apart. I was hardly a person anymore. A hollow laugh tried to form but blood was what came out instead. Weakly I struggled to raise my hand. Putting it on her lap, I tried to tighten my grip. She looked down. "D-don't worry, I'll save you. I can do it! I can!"

She was lying. She wasted so much of her energy healing Ichigo, she healed the espada as well. She was tired, I could tell from her face. She wasn't sure if she could heal me but I didn't want her too. For her to take away from herself to heal me? No. She should use it to heal the others, the others who had a right to be here. The ones who didn't come here for their own selfish reasons.

I wanted to save her so she could awknowledge my love for her. I wanted her to love me and only me.

Just love me.

Only a fiend would make an angel weep. I reminded myself as her tears fell on my cheek. I closed my eyes for a moment as her tear streamed down my cheek.

Oh, I wanted to cry. But she's doing it for me. She was too perfect.

Ichigo, he better protect her. If he doesn't, I'll make sure to come back and castrate him. After He becomes a **true** redhead first.

I tried to open my eyes but only caused them to flutter before closing once more. It was futile, I've lost too much energy.

It was dark but my light was safe and that was good enough for me. "O..ori...hime..."

"Y-yes, Sakurai-san??" She sniffled, she shuffled as she tried to place my form on her lap.

There were so many things I wanted to say, so many things I had wanted to experience with her. I wanted to scream my love for her to the world. I wanted to show my true self to everyone. To my squad members, to Ryoichi.

Oh, Ryoichi. I should have really informed him of my leave.

In the end, I hadn't even kept true to the rules of squad 11. I hadn't fought for enjoyment but for duty. To protect the one I love, to free her from her hell.

Was I ever truly fit to be in squad 11?

I'm not sure. Realizing I had run out of time, I said the thing that I felt would sum up everything she had done for me in two words.

"T-tha...nk...you..."

Everything had gone black after that. I'm sure she was crying, she's that kind of person.

So sweet, so sweet that angel of mine.

**.:. End.:.**

My first time doing a story with a female character being the love interest!(Usually it's the girl going for the guy. xD) Hope I did well. x3 Sorry if it's too long. 0_0U

Comments and critisim welcomed!


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